David Steele has written what ought to become a benchmark in its field. Practical, proactive, easy-to-read and jargon free, David Steele helps his readers learn how to identify the kind of people they want to be with, how to weed out bad matches before asking for or accepting a date, and how to become really, really CLEAR about the kind of life partner relationship they want to grow.

This is a book that I recommend to all of my clients who are dating or planning on dating at some time in the future. You can tell that David Steele, MA, founder of the Relationship Coaching Institute is a relationship coach, because he’s darned good at it.

If you don’t have this book, buy it; you’ll be happy that you did.

George Polley, MSW, LICSW
psychotherapist and life coach

This is the book the dating world has been waiting for. A book that really asks you to answer the simple question – ‘what are you looking for in a relationship?’ Then the book takes you through helpful tips and insights to help you discover and anchor those needs, wants and requirements.

Many other dating/relationship books fall into two categories – simple tips/tricks to get dates, or inner search material that’s so high minded you’re still left a little confused.

After reading this book, men and women alike should be able to assess where they are in their relationship life-stage (recreational dating, in the midst of a ‘mini-marriage,’ looking for a life partner), and be clear on what they need and seek from a partner – now and in the future.

While the book has a section on approaching potential partners, detailed support material in this area (scripted approaching techniques, field-tested ice breakers, etc.) are probably best left to relationship coaches, done through sites like mine and others.

What this book will provide is a foundational framework to ensure future relationship success.

- GiddyupGuy

This book contains two absolutely marvelous concepts that really grabbed me. The big one was “Be The Chooser.” It’s not a new idea, but it was phrased in a way that helped me understand, very simply and solidly, exactly what it means to be proactive in looking for a good relationship. Another one was the clear explanation of the difference between dating for relationship practice, dating to find a life partner, and the big mistake of “dating to mate.” and how to tell which you’re doing and which you should be doing.

Other than that, this book isn’t all THAT new and different. After all, there aren’t many relationship books that have something genuinely new to say. But it is approachable, accessible, and totally reassuring, which is a huge plus in a universe of how-to-find-love books that start with the assumption that if you’re still single, there’s something wrong with you that needs to be fixed. Thank goodness for a book that starts with the assumption that it’s perfectly fine not to be racing down the aisle with the first likely suspect.